You can't go wrong with, "You smell great."
1. "You smell great, like a lumberjack that
rolled around in a puddle of Nutella." If
there's one thing romantic comedies have drilled into guys' heads, it's that
they need to smell like fresh sandalwood and boysenberries so that when they
inadvertently leave their shirt at their girlfriends' house, she can spend all
day smelling it and staring at the ceiling and pining for them. It makes guys
feel really good when you act like they smell like anything other than Irish
Springs bar soap.
2. "I feel safe with you." Men want to feel like a giant cuddly teddy bear/murderous black
bear hybrid. This one covers all the bases because it's like you're telling
them you feel safe in their arms, but you also would feel safe in the event
that you were both attacked by a wolf.
3. "Have you been working out?" Just
pretend he has muscles, OK?
4. "You're really handy around the house." Blame the far-reaching and deeply ingrained dogma of Home Improvement, but it's manly as hell
to be able to fix a sink or refurbish whatever it is you refurbish (chairs?).
If you can make a guy feel like he's Ty Pennington just because he wedged a
book under that wobbly table, he'll feel great for weeks.
5. "You have a nice butt." Just because, "Hey, nice penis!" sounds creepy. And
who doesn't want a nice butt?
6. "You dress so well." Most men don't know how to dress. If he ever tucks his dress
shirt into his pants, he probably thinks he pulled off a Justin
Timberlake-level move. Congratulate him on having the fashion sense to not look
like he just came off a week-long bender.
7. "Your job is so cool." Most
people don't really like their jobs, and the fact that they spend a lot of their
life there is pretty depressing. Hearing you say you're actually jealous of
what they do for a living is a great pick-me-up.
8. "You crack me up." According
to Pinterest, Marilyn Monroe once said, "If you can make a girl laugh, you
can make her do anything." Like date you.
9. "You're so good at going down on me." Men are still stuck with the antiquated notion of being
providers, and that includes providing orgasms to your vagina, dammit. Men need
to know that they are the best orgasm-giver you have ever been with and
further, that everyone else has a smaller penis.
10. "You have the most kissable lips." We are
just programmed to back away slowly when you start giving compliments about
physical appearance. This one is OK though because it also means you want to
kiss us.
11. "You
really turn me on." Telling
your boyfriend that you not only find him physically attractive, but that you
actually have to physically resist the urge to jump his bones all the time is
the second-highest honor you can pay a man. (The highest honor is knighthood,
obviously).
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