¡Aprendamos juntos! Estoy compartiendo con ustedes lo que es y me gusta el "Romance". Buscamos temas de interes sobre la vida diaria de las parejas para aprender y mucho mas. Tambien contestamos sus preguntas. ¡Escríbeme!
Let's learn together! I'm sharing with you what "Romance" is and what I like. We look for interesting topics about the daily life of couples to learn and much more. We also answer your questions. Write to me!
Having trouble achieving orgasm? Not only are you not alone, but there are many reasons why you might be suffering from FOD.
Emotional trauma or Sexual or Physical Abuse
There
is no doubt that women with a history of abuse are at greater risk for
all sorts of emotional and physical problems—especially depression and
anxiety—that can negatively impact their sex lives.
Medications, Alcohol and Surgery
Excessive
amounts of alcohol, blood pressure medications, antidepressants know as
selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, anti-anxiety medications and
sedatives can delay or impede orgasm. Severed pelvic nerves, as a result
of surgery or childbirth, can inhibit the engorgement of the genitals—a
precondition for building to a climax.
Inadequate Sex
You
simply can't talk about orgasm without mentioning sexual techniques.
Making love is not something we are born knowing; we have to learn how
to give and receive sexual stimulation and satisfaction. Due to a
variety of reasons—cultural, religious and personal—some women are
uncomfortable discussing and exploring the sexual techniques that might
bring on or intensify an orgasm.
Pelvic Floor Prolapse
This
condition occurs when the muscles that support your pelvic organs
weaken and loosen. Prolapse can result from childbirth, aging, surgery
and spinal cord injury.
Health problems (e.g., certain drugs, hormonal disorders,
chronic illnesses, pelvic pain, nerve damage)
Psychological factors (e.g., anxiety, stress, lack of trust
in a partner)
Cultural factors (e.g., lack of recognition of female sexual
pleasure)
Medications (e.g., some antipsychotics, selective serotonin
reuptake inhibitors)
Sexy adult love coupons are a totally creative new twist on the
traditional love coupons. They are more adult oriented and intimate for
sensual and erotic experiences with your lover. These adult love
coupons are always 100% FREE. You just print them out and redeem them
with your lover. Our sexy coupons can be used anytime or anywhere so be
creative and surprise your partner with one of our adult love coupons
today!
Adult love coupons are a great way to spice up a relationship. You can create an adult love coupon
book for any occasion just to add some interest into your love life.
Your partner will certainly be pleased and surprised with this exciting
gift. Adult love coupons are also the ideal gift for those special
occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day and the
holidays. Whatever your reason for giving an adult love coupon book, your partner will surely get a lot of use out of the following twenty five suggestions:
1. A day of pampering
2. A foot rub while we watch a romantic movie
3. A romantic evening at your favorite restaurant
4. A bouquet of roses that we can use in the bedroom
5. One night of slow dancing
6. I’m your sex slave for the day
7. All day deep, intimate kisses whenever you want
8. You are in charge in bed
9. A romantic bath for two with bubbles and wine
10. You can breakout the video camera and play director
11. A night of erotic conversation
12. Breakfast in bed after a long night of lovemaking
13. An evening of naked Twister
14. I will send you one adult email or love letter
15. An intimate evening of your favorite cocktails we will drink together. Naked.
16. One hour of full body massage with scented, warm oil
17. I will indulge you in one fantasy of your choice
18. I will list what I love most about your body and mind
19. I’ll let you relax while I bathe you in a bubble bath
20. One free quickie whenever you want
21. One sexy strip tease
22. Your wish is my command
23. Champagne and strawberries in bed
24. I’ll put on a lingerie fashion show for you
25. I’ll be your sexy model for erotic pictures
Use some of our premade adult love coupons or make some yourself with our very own custom eLuvCoupon creator! Simply print them out and use when needed! You can even make some adult love coupons
yourself with some construction paper, or whatever materials you can
dream up. When you need some extra attention from your partner, just
grab one of your adult love coupons and redeem for a night of romantic bliss!
If she is laying down draw one of her arms above her head and
lightly hold her hand. Commence by kissing the soft area on the inside
of her upper arm – from her elbow down to her chest. For variation,
trail the tip of your tongue in a zigzag down this area. This absolutely
drives my wife crazy! (submitted by Troy)
Kiss her gently near the clavicle (colar bone), then run your
tongue in a zig zag up to her ear very slowly. Give her earlobe a little
nibble. It’s all in the neck guys… (submitted by Dave)
When you’re sitting close to your love, start out by softly
stroking their face, slowly move your hand to their mouth then very
lightly brush the lower lip with one of your fingers. If they seem to
love this, then place the tip of that finger in their mouth. My
boyfriend loves this, and sometimes he’ll start sucking my finger a bit.
This leads to a great french kiss! (submitted by KC)
Gently kiss your partner on the neck, cheek, jaw, and slowly move
closer to his/her lips. When you reach their lips, they will be all the
more excited to kiss you! My boyfriend sometimes does this and it drives
me crazy! (submitted by Christi)
Start by pouring a glass of wine. Take a few sips to get the taste
in your mouth. When you lead him to bed, bring the wine with you. While
kissing him, dip your finger in the wine. Trace his lips and mouth with
your wine-soaked finger and lick the wine off slowly and gently. Take
your time. Kissing can be very erotic. (submitted by Heather)
I play a kissing game with my wife. The object of the game is to
make your partner try to kiss you. This could be done by lightly kissing
her neck, breathing into her ear, kissing her cheeks, and lightly
kissing her lips. Whoever lasts the longest wins! (submitted by Guntes)
Sensually whisper something a litte bit naughty in their ear such
as “I want you…” or make up your own. Let them feel your breath next to
their ear, then kiss it and gently nibble it. Move down towards their
neck and back up to their lips. This drives my husband crazy! (submitted
by Gloria)
When kissing…try to catch his/her upper lip between your lips as
you’re closing your mouth, and suck lightly before letting go.
(submitted by Ryan)
When kissing really passionately, stroke the nape of his neck with your fingers. (submitted by Beth)
Think of why you like certain body parts of your love, or why you
love to kiss those body parts. For each area, give them a quick kiss
there, then whisper why you love that part. Move up and down their body
sprinkling them with kisses and sweet words.
It's hard, especially if you've been a long-term relationship or marriage, to keep the sexy alive. It's easy
to fall into a rut when it comes to a romp in the bedroom -- we've all
done it -- and harder than ever to come back out of the rut with some new sexy moves.
There's no one better to discuss how to please a man then, well, another man.
Here are 15 suggestions from guys about how to bring the heat back into your relationship:
1. Strap on some sexy stockings and a garter belt.
2. Keep your naughty bits well-maintained. A simple trim can suffice if a bikini wax is an undesirable (ouch!) option.
3. Try a lap-dance or a sexy strip-tease. That doesn't mean you have
to spend a fortune on lingerie -- you can easily remove the frumpiest
clothes sexily.
4. Sexy texts can really get him going. Send him something like, "I
can't wait for you to get home tonight -- got a surprise for you," and,
well, give him a surprise!
5. If you're separated by many miles, try phone sex. It may feel weird at first, but it can be wicked sexy if you go with it.
6. Try something new. If your man isn't someone who is loud in the bedroom, explore new territory with him.
7. Lose all your inhibitions. Nothing revs a man up more than knowing that what he's doing to you is driving you wild.
8. Guide him into doing what you like. Take his hand and put it
wherever you'd like it to go -- not only is this sexy for you, it's a
total turn-on for a guy.
9. Just like women like a blended orgasm (more than one part of the
vagina stimulated at the same time), men do, too. Try mixing up a
hand-job or a blow-job by playing with his testicles.
10. Talk dirty to him. If you're not used to it, it may feel WAY
awkward, but the more you do it, the more second-nature it will become.
And there's a bonus! It may turn you on, too.
11. Bust out the sex toys -- remember, they can be multipurpose. Use
them to stimulate the shaft of the penis while giving a blow-job to
bring him to new heights of orgasm.
12. Switch positions. It's easy to fall into the whole, "We have sex
missionary style," or "I'm always on top," but you may find yourself
pleasantly surprised by new positions.
13. Make sex a surprise. Put on his favorite pair of underwear and meet him at the door when he comes home from work.
14. Join him in the shower. No reason getting clean can't come AFTER getting dirty.
15. Bring a bunch of pillows into the bedroom. They'll help to achieve -- and enjoy -- new sexual positions.
When it comes to lovemaking, many women experience difficulty trying to
achieve orgasm, and some women have never been able to reach orgasm.
This condition is call female orgasmic disorder (FOD). Women with FOD
fall into two categories—they either never have been able to achieve
orgasm or they, for some reason, are no longer able to achieve orgasm as
they once did. Many experts believe FOD to be the most challenging
sexual dysfunction to treat.
Causes of Female Orgasmic Disorder
Having trouble achieving orgasm? Not only are you not alone, but there are many reasons why you might be suffering from FOD.
Emotional trauma or Sexual or Physical Abuse There
is no doubt that women with a history of abuse are at greater risk for
all sorts of emotional and physical problems—especially depression and
anxiety—that can negatively impact their sex lives.
Medications, Alcohol and Surgery Excessive
amounts of alcohol, blood pressure medications, antidepressants know as
selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, anti-anxiety medications and
sedatives can delay or impede orgasm. Severed pelvic nerves, as a result
of surgery or childbirth, can inhibit the engorgement of the genitals—a
precondition for building to a climax.
Inadequate Sex You
simply can't talk about orgasm without mentioning sexual techniques.
Making love is not something we are born knowing; we have to learn how
to give and receive sexual stimulation and satisfaction. Due to a
variety of reasons—cultural, religious and personal—some women are
uncomfortable discussing and exploring the sexual techniques that might
bring on or intensify an orgasm.
Pelvic Floor Prolapse This
condition occurs when the muscles that support your pelvic organs
weaken and loosen. Prolapse can result from childbirth, aging, surgery
and spinal cord injury.
Treating Problems with Orgasm
Counseling
Counseling is recommended for victims of sexual abuse. The treatment
process is long and arduous, but it can help an abused woman reclaim her
sexuality. Counseling is also recommended for couples experiencing
relationship problems based on the distress caused by FOD.
Changing Medications
It may be helpful to try switching medications that are known to impede
orgasm. Your doctor can help you sort through your options. For example,
some antidepressants have fewer sexual side effects.
Communication
Honest communication with your partner may help you to achieve orgasm or
satisfying sex. Good communication can help you and your partner become
experts in arousing each other. It is important for women to talk about
what they like, and to keep communication positive. Counseling may help
open up these lines of communication. Look for positive online
communities such as www.EmbracingWomensHealth.com where you can talk to
others experiencing the same frustrations.
Kegel Exercises
Toning your pelvic muscles with Kegel exercises can help you achieve
more intense orgasms. To strengthen these muscles, start and stop your
stream of urine several times. Work up to five sets of 10 contractions a
day. The longer you hold the contractions, the stronger your muscles
will become.
Una de las consultas más frecuentes que
recibimos en Médicos Consultores, gira alrededor de la temática del Orgasmo
Femenino.
La Dra Andrea Sala presenta el tema.
Una de las consultas más
frecuentes que recibimos en Médicos Consultores, gira alrededor de la
temática del Orgasmo Femenino.
Así, se nos plantean consultas que van dirigidas en forma directa o indirecta
a la presentación de una problemática en torno a la respuesta orgasmica de la
mujer, como ser la Anorgasmia.
También observamos que detrás de estas consultas enfocadas hacia el punto
problema, se esconde una falta de Educación Sexual.
Por esto ultimo, hoy nos vamos a preguntar ¿qué sabemos del Orgasmo
Femenino?.
En principio vamos a ver que en la respuesta sexual de la mujer, las cuales
muestran que ocurren cuando una mujer se excita durante cualquier acto
sexual, podemos describir cuatro etapas que han sido denominadas: excitación,
meseta, orgasmo y resolución. Estas etapas son un proceso continuo que ocurre
durante la respuesta sexual y en la mujer demora por lo general unos 15
minutos, a diferencia del hombre que usualmente llega al orgasmo entre 3 y 5
minutos.
Según Masters y Johnson, el orgasmo es un breve episodio de liberación física
del aumento previo de la tensión muscular, de la congestión sanguínea pélvica
y de la sensación corporal de excitación, y la percepción subjetiva de este
clímax. Esta liberación energética se evidencia por descargas musculares
rítmicas a nivel genital; aunque también comprometen el resto del cuerpo.
Estas contracciones son sumamente placenteras para ambos sexos y producen una
sensación de alivio y relajación. Después de ellas al hombre y a la mujer los
invade una sensación de placidez, bienestar y afecto mutuo.
De lo anteriormente citado, podemos desprender que el orgasmo sirve
fisiológicamente como un efecto liberador de la tensión placentera acumulada,
básicamente desde este punto su función es la descongestión tensional y,
desde lo subjetivo, la intensa vivencia del placer. Así, la percepción de la
respuesta orgasmica varia según la intensidad, la duración, la cantidad, el
grado de excitación, el cansancio y las tensiones previas; si uno esta de
buen o mal humor. Podríamos decir, entonces, que hay distintas cualidades de
percepción del orgasmo; por lo tanto, no todos los orgasmos son vividos de
igual manera.
¿Orgasmo vaginal o clitoridiano?. Esta es otra consulta frecuente y debemos
afirmar que la respuesta orgasmica es una sola, aun cuando los estímulos
pueden recibirse a través de distintas zonas del cuerpo (estimulación de los
pezones, caricias en el monte de venus, etc.), o con la fantasía. Están
aquellas que constituyen el grueso de la población femenina que terminan si
son estimuladas en la zona del clítoris y de los labios menores.
Aproximadamente solo un 35 % de la población femenina llega al orgasmo
exclusivamente por penetración, con la aclaración de que siempre la
estimulación directa o indirecta del clítoris participa en esta respuesta.
Actualmente se considera normal tener orgasmo, con independencia de la vía de
estimulación a la que esta mujer y su pareja recurran.
En referencia al tiempo y a la cantidad de orgasmos; a diferencia del varón,
algunas mujeres tienen la posibilidad de obtener múltiples orgasmos, tantos
como la continuidad del juego amoroso lo permita.
Vale aclarar, que una mujer tenga muchos orgasmos no ocasiona ningún
trastorno y también que la cantidad no es indicativa de un mejor
funcionamiento sexual (y esto también es valido para el varón). Hay mujeres
que tienen un solo orgasmo de gran intensidad, después del cual quedan
satisfechas.
Es importante mencionar que el orgasmo en una mujer, es un comportamiento que
se aprende y no algo que se sabe naciendo. Obtener el primer orgasmo es un
proceso que requiere practica y mucha paciencia.
También es importante recordar que muchas mujeres necesitan que el clítoris
sea estimulado directamente para poder llegar al orgasmo. Es decir, no basta
solo con la penetración para que una mujer llegue al orgasmo. En muchos
casos, durante la penetración vaginal, el clítoris no recibe la necesaria
estimulación, por eso se debe recurrir a la estimulación manual, oral u otras
posiciones que proporcionen estimulación directa y consistente al clítoris.
Por ultimo, para que la mujer llegue al orgasmo es tan importante la
lubricación de la vagina, como lo es la estimulación del clítoris. Una vagina
que no esta lubricada lo suficiente resultara en una penetración dolorosa,
bloqueando la obtención el placer y, por consiguiente, evitando que la mujer
llegue al orgasmo. Por eso es muy importante que previo a la penetración,
durante la fase de excitación, la mujer reciba el suficiente estimulo erótico
para poder lubricar la vagina y lograr que esta se expanda y crezca para
recibir el pene.
El secreto para obtener el mayor placer de una relación sexual es conocer lo
que ocurre en nuestro cuerpo, al igual que en el de nuestra pareja, y mucha
comunicación.
Podríamos culminar diciendo, que el orgasmo es como un abandonar nuestro
propio cuerpo y sentir que no existe tiempo ni espacio. Durante el orgasmo se
siente que todo se pierde y todo se gana. Es como sentirse inmerso en un
mundo nuevo e impensable.
Dra. Andrea R. Sala
Psiquiatría - Psicología
www.medicosconsultores.com/drasala
Too many of us woman are struggling to orgasm –
but the key starts with you according to orgasm coach, Dr Lisa Turner.
Let the toe curling commence….
by Kate Gilbert
Frustrated women everywhere – you are not alone. Studies suggest anywhere between 10%-50% of women rarely or never achieve orgasm.
Most women have nothing physically wrong, but still fail to achieve
that magical happy ending. Instead, the problem is usually in the mind,
with causes ranging from lack of confidence, guilt, inability to relax
and past trauma.
We spoke to Orgasm Coach, Dr Lisa Turner and asked for her tips to get us all hitting those top notes…
‘For women, orgasm is about letting go, giving yourself time, and
space to enjoy your body. It’s about loving yourself and allowing
yourself to be loved. It’s about being fully present in the moment and
allowing yourself to be utterly selfish. Orgasm is, after all the
ultimate luxury.’
Too right.
Follow Lisa’s 4 Point Plan and you should be smiling in no time…. 1. Love Yourself and Take Responsibility for Your Own Pleasure
Many women’s brains are hardwired to put other’s
pleasure first. If you want to achieve orgasm, you have to love yourself
first. It is not by accident that men say “ladies first”.
No-one can give you an orgasm, but you can take one. Take
responsibility for your own pleasure. If your partner is not touching
you in the way you like, show him how. 2. Get in Tune With Your Body
Many people are very out of touch with their bodies.
They are disconnected. Sometimes this is simply a habit caused by the
way we live. Much of our work and entertainment is focused on
entertaining the mind and not the body.
A simple practice similar to meditation can bring you back into your body.
In many cases where women have experienced emotional trauma they
partially leave their body or dissociate from it so that they don’t have
to feel the emotional pain. In the longer term it results in a women
being completely out of tune with her body so that she feels very
little, either physically or emotionally. Emotional release techniques
like those used in orgasm coaching are highly recommended to resolve
this. 3. Exercise the Muscles
There is a very strong link between how toned the pelvic floor muscles are and the intensity and achievement of orgasm.
Here is some simple exercises that will bring awareness into your
body, increase the flow of blood to the sexual organs, heighten their
sensitivity and increase the ability to achieve orgasms and increase
their intensity.
There are three main sphincters which you can focus on and
strengthen. Unlike the generic “pelvic floor” exercises, these aim to
isolate the muscles, which will increase your awareness of them and this
area.
1. The Anal Sphincter
These are the muscles involved in stopping a bowel movement or
breaking wind. Gently contract and relax this sphincter 10 times with
the breath. Contract on the in-breath, relax on the out breath.
2. The Vaginal Sphincter
If you need to insert some fingers so that you can be sure you are
contracting these, then do. Gently contract and relax these muscles 10
times with the breath. Contract on the in-breath, relax on the out
breath.
3. The Urethral Sphincter
These are the muscles that stop you passing urine. Gently contract
and relax these 10 times with the breath. Contract on the in-breath,
relax on the out breath. When you contract these muscles you will feel a
“lift” and it should stimulate the clitoris also.
These muscles are essential for orgasms and it is even possible to
induce orgasm by contracting these muscles alone with no other
stimulation. 4. Masturbate, masturbate, masturbate, and masturbate some more
For you to achieve orgasm you must practice, and masturbation is your practice.
When you are masturbating, focus on finding and exploring what gives
you pleasure, vary the speed and pressure. Don’t try to have an orgasm,
instead try to find what feels good.
Buying a sex toy such as a vibrator can also be a way of exploring what gives you pleasure and take any pressure off yourself.
There is no failure; you just have not achieved it yet. Keep doing what feels good. Keep practicing.
The Male G Spot (or P Spot) is located in the lower rectum in
that area is in contact with the prostate or prostate gland. This area
is rich in nerve endings and very sensitive to touch. Moreover, the
stimulation of the prostate (also known as “prostate milking”, “prostate
massage” or “milking the prostate”) can cause intense male ejaculation
and orgasm. In fact, to get a semen sample to a person suffering
Anejaculation (a condition where men cannot ejaculate) is necessary to
introduce an electric probe in the rectum and excite the nerves of this
part of it (electroejaculation). The P Spot is the equivalent to the
female G spot.
Where Is The Prostate Located?
The prostate is placed over the perineum, along the rectum and below
the bladder. The perineum is the muscle located between the anus and the
base of the testicles.
The function of the prostate is to produce some of the seminal fluid that protects and nourishes sperm cells in semen.
How To Stimulate The Male G Spot
Preparations
The active partner must have clean hands and nails perfectly cut. It is
necessary to thoroughly lubricate the anus of the passive partner. You
must use a water-based lubricant in gel form (compatible with latex), as
will also be desirable for the active partner put a condom on your
finger or a latex glove in his hand. You will not get dirty and will
protect both of any possible infection (AIDS, hepatitis, gonorrhea,
etc.). It is advisable to wash the anal area before starting. To do
this, you can use an enema bulb syringe (pictured above) to inject the
water into the rectum to wash the inside walls.
Relaxation
Two muscle rings called sphincters surround the anal opening and each
works independently. The external sphincter is controlled at will by
the central nervous system (for example, the muscles of the hand). This
sphincter can tense and relax at any time. The internal sphincter is
controlled by the autonomic nervous system (eg, heartbeat); reflects and
responds to fear and anxiety during anal practices. The uncertainty
will cause the anus to tense up automatically even if the passive
partner is trying to relax. This may need to learn voluntary control
over their internal sphincter to relax at will. You can do this
regularly insert your finger into your anus (in the shower, while
bathing day) and feel the muscles. Moreover, a hot bath before sexual
practices increases the blood supply to the prostate and its
sensitivity.
Preliminaries
It is important to get to this point once the man is aroused. First
it is recommended to stimulate the penis. Then massage the perineal
area, and then externally stimulate the anus. Circling the anus with a
well lubricated fingertip, analingus and other techniques are good
techniques to use before hitting the male Gspot.
Stimulating The Male GSpot
Insert a well lubricated finger in the rectum and use a deep circular
massaging motion in order to achieve a relaxed state and get used to
the feeling of the presence of foreign body in the anus. Once
penetration is achieved, massages in the form of upward and downward,
making a slight pressure on the wall of the anus that is above the
testicles, fingers curving inward. The prostate is identified by touch
as small lumps the size of a walnut.
Over time, it may prove more penetration with a finger. You can also
use a soft anal sex toy designed for men, which is not rigid and adapted
to the walls of the anus. The excitement of the P Spot can be performed
to accompany other sexual practices such as fellatio or masturbation.
Warnings About Anal Sex
Anal sex the wrong way (lack of lubrication or excessive force) can
lead to hemorrhoids, anal fissures, rectal prolapse (when the tissue
that lines the rectum falls down into or sticks through the anal
opening), anorectal trauma and other problems like that. It is important
not to force the passive partner in any way.
The location of the G-Spot is approximately 1-3" on the ceiling of the vagina.
To stimulate the gspot, insert 1 finger inside a woman's vagina and make a "come hither" motion.
It is considered the most sensitive part inside a womans' vagina, and
when the G Spot is properly stimulated, it can lead to female
ejaculation.
Female G-Spot 101
The “Grafenberg Spot,” or what is more popularly known as the G spot, was first discovered by German doctor, Ernst Grafenberg
in the fifties. It is actually a spongy tissue that is located on the
vagina’s inner wall. For the women who already have discovered their own
G spot, it is considered their pleasure zone. Most
people think that it is a myth since they have not found it. However,
each woman has her own G spot. It is however a bit complicated to identify, and the response to sexual stimulation among women differ.
Because of the fact that a lot of women are not
believers of the existence of the G spot, there are a lot of myths that
surround this mysterious gland, along with the idea that locating the G spot
of a woman is the sole technique of inducing an orgasm. This is untrue.
As a matter of fact, women are able to achieve orgasms by stimulating
the clitoris, the vagina, or the breasts. Still another false theory is
that women who do not achieve orgasms through the stimulation of their G spot could have medical problems. Actually, there are different responses to stimulation of the G spot.
Understanding the G Spot
Every woman has a G spot in her body. The female G spot
has a similar structure and functions much like a man’s prostrate. As a
matter of fact, the male prostate is frequently referred to as a male Gspot
since the stimulation of the prostate can result in great sexual
pleasure. The prostate is stimulated only through a man’s rectum. The G spot is just one of many glands that are positioned on a woman’s vaginal wall.
It could also surround the opening of the urethra and takes the role of
the prostate, ejaculating fluid when it is sexually stimulated. It is
located around two inches starting from the opening of the vagina. To
find it, you will need to insert your middle or index finger inside the
vagina. When you have reached around two inches on the opening, you will
need to curve your finger to the direction of your belly button.
Feeling the Gspot with your finger, it is somewhat as
big as a quarter and feels a bit rougher than other vaginal tissue. It
is comprised of several nerve endings along with numerous blood vessels.
These vessels become blood-engorged when aroused, and are the reasons
that a G spot is able to produce highly intense orgasms.
As soon as the G spot is located, it
can be stimulated by a man through movements of his finger in small
circular motions. The initial stimulation may cause a woman to feel a
strong and urge to urinate. However, this sensation passes after a short
while and could be replaced by feelings of pleasure and arousal. Even
if women in general are able to experience the feeling of stimulation on
the G spot, their responses could vary. While some women may have an orgasm by stimulating the G spot alone, other women may not. There are those who experience intense orgasms through a mixture of G spot
as well as clitoral stimulation, while others could have the same
intensity orgasms during intercourse in certain positions that arouse
the G spot. Then there are those who do not find the
stimulation of their G spots enjoyable for the most part. For women who
do experience orgasm from this type of stimulation, they claimed that
it is quite different from orgasms from clitoral stimulation. The
reason most probably lies in the fact that nerves that supporting the
woman’s G spot are completely different from those that
are meant for the clitoris or the vulva. It gives support to the
hypothesis that the woman’s G spot is a pathway that is totally
separated for orgasm. People believe that a G spot must be considered as
another way to provide women sexual pleasure in the
sexual act. Every woman will respond differently, and every couple has
to try and find out how the elusive spot figures into their most
intimate life. Theoretically, a woman must learn how to take pleasure in
G spot stimulation though someone who is already
satisfied with her personal sex life would probably not see why she has
to work on anything that does not really give her pleasure, initially at
least.
About Female Ejaculation
Although all females do have G spots, it is estimated
that 10-20% of females are able to experience ejaculation. G spots do
not have to be stimulated in order for an ejaculation to happen,
although some womenclaim that their very first experience with ejaculation was a result of G spot
stimulation. Responses vary, starting from a very light sprinkle up to a
great gush of large quantities of fluid. Studies show that a lot of
women feel like they have to urinate prior to
ejaculation, though the fluid is certainly not urine. It does not also
come from what is referred to as a “Bartholin” gland that is responsible
for producing the milky and odorless discharge, which serves as a
lubricant for the vagina during sexual arousal. It is recognized today
that the distinction between a woman who spurts out liquid and one who
doesn’t is on the amount and the particular size of her pariurethral
glands. These glands are equivalent to the numerous tiny glands
constituting the prostate gland of a man, which is responsible for about
15-50% of fluid he would ejaculate. The false theories that ejaculation
with females are caused by the improper function of her bladder, or an
excessive secretion sweating from her vaginal walls, including powerful
pools located behind the vagina that spurts out when muscles contract
during an orgasm, has already been established as untrue. A lot of women
have thought it to be abnormal in the past years, which is why they have
to either avoid it or hide it completely. It has now been established
by studies that have been conducted among women, that one in five women
does ejaculate by means of her urethra, and not her vagina. This could
happen sometimes, but not all of the time.
To stimulate yourGspot
is to be able to produce female ejaculation as well as deep
contractions of the uterus. It has been said that a woman’s response to
the direct stimulation of her G spot is the same as a man’s response to
prostate stimulation. There is an initial need to urinate, a sensation
that lasts a few seconds, before the feeling of sexual enjoyment begins.
Women who have PC muscles that are well toned are also a lot more
inclined to experience an ejaculation as well as enjoy much better
orgasms. Ejaculations come easier with a lot of women once they have
already gone through some orgasms. With others, ejaculation may occur on
the first orgasm. A common factor appears to be intense arousal
together with the stimulation of the G spot and the clitoris for a
longer period of time. A lot of porn movies as well as erotic reading
material show that a man’s ejaculation may actually shoot out. In
reality however, at least 75% of males ejaculate semen that is pushed
out with minimal force so that the liquid secreted does not go a great
distance past the penile tip. In other words, a lot of males ooze out
rather than spurt. The semen does not actually shoot out, but dribbles
instead. In the same manner, when the female secretes liquid besides
urine coming from the urethra, it need not squirt in order for it to be
recognized as an ejaculation. Since women have hardly
taken notice of it because of the fact that it does not come out as a
strong spurt, it may contribute to them reporting that they have never
experienced an ejaculation.
Differentiating Vaginal and Clitoral Orgasms
The distinction between vaginal orgasms
and clitoral orgasms can be found on which is being stimulated in order
to experience an orgasm, rather than where an orgasm is actually felt.
The clitoris plays a key part in increasing the sensation of sexual
arousal. During the period of clitoral stimulation, the
clitoris becomes swollen and shifts its position. Blood vessels that
surround the whole pelvic area swell up as well, which cause the
engorgement and the feeling of fullness as well as sexual sensitivity.
The internal vaginal lips become swollen and the shape changes. The
vagina then balloons in an upward direction, while the uterus changes
its position within the pelvis. There are some women whose outer parts
of the vagina and cervix are extremely sensitive too, sometime a lot
more sensitive than their clitoris. Stimulating these particular areas
during the act of intercourse, or any other type of penetration to the
vagina could produce very strong orgasms. This is called the vaginal
orgasm with no stimulation to the clitoris. According to Sigmund Freud,
mature women can only experience orgasms when the vagina, including the
clitoris, is provided with stimulation. This means that the male penis
plays a central role in generating sexual satisfaction. This has of
course been proven wrong as well. Penetration into a woman’s vagina is
not a requirement to achieve a good orgasm. The G spot stimulation can also cause orgasmic contractions in this area with success, found several inches on top of the pelvis.
The Health Benefits of Female Orgasms
Orgasms are not only considered to be the ultimate
climax of sexual pleasure, they do offer a lot of health benefits too.
One of the best things a good orgasm can give is relieve stress. When
the heart beats faster during sex, there is also an increase in the flow
of blood while the muscles tighten up. This comes to a conclusion
brought about by an orgasm, which releases tensions that are pent up
within the nervous system. Orgasms are also a great aid in being able to
sleep a lot better. As the male is orgasm is preceded by an abrupt drop
in his blood pressure, as well as immediate relaxation, it has a more
progressive effect on women, though it is not by any means less
important. An orgasm is like a natural anesthetic. When endorphins are
released, the effect can be extremely calming. Additionally, an orgasm
can lessen one’s cravings for unhealthy junk food. It can also lessen
the urge to smoke cigarettes. Sexual stimulation triggers the generation
of phenetylamine that is a type of amphetamine, which regulates the
appetite. Orgasms can burn calories too. Finally, an orgasm works on
naturally managing pain. People have found that
headaches and menstrual cramps can disappear during masturbation or
while indulging in sex. Endorphins, which are natural compounds quite
similar to morphine, would be released from the body when one is having
sex and increases a person’s tolerance to pain to about 70% when
experiencing an orgasm. This of course, varies among different people.
G Spot Stimulation Tips
Before a man tries to stimulate your gspot,
it may be necessary to stimulate the woman’s clitoris first, as a sort
of warming up. This will also prepare her before her partner goes
directly for the spot, allowing her to get more aroused and lubricated
in the process, and make it easier for her to achieve an orgasm.
Nevertheless, too much stimulation to the clitoris can make it more
sensitive, so communication is necessary as well. Both partners must
also be comfortable and the male partner must be able to use his hand
easily as this process could take a bit of time. A recommendation is
that both be very stable, as the pleasure derived from stimulation could
cause both partners to lose control. It is a good idea to lie beside
the woman while she is flat on her back and make use of the strongest
arm to provide stimulation. The “doggie” style is a good position too.
The male partner must then rub his bent finger around the G spot starting
lightly and slowly before building up to a stronger level, without
being rough. Again, communication is necessary so that the woman may be
able to let her partner know what she is most comfortable with.
Prolonged foreplay can be a prelude to a huge orgasm but it is just as
important to know if the woman is experiencing the sexual pleasure the
male is hoping to provide.
Discovering the woman’s G spot may very well be the beginning of highly satisfying sex, not only for the female but for her male partner as well. A bedroom players guide may
sometimes be necessary. The important thing to remember is that
communication while having sex is the key to providing each other with
great pleasure.
Since technology is advancing with every
passing minute, sending your love one , love letters and notes are a
thing of the past. Today, almost everybody uses a cell phone and
communicates either by sending text messages or calling, of course.
Text messages sent during occasions serve as a reminder that one is
being remembered on that day. Conversational and romantic messages are
exchanged plenty of times during the day and to help you choose the
perfect text for your girl friend, you can take a look at these.
Good morning Sunshine (To wake her up and keep her cheerful all day).
I’m thinking of you and wanted to tell you that I love you.
Every day would be as beautiful as this moment if you were with me.
If I could describe you in one word, I’d call you my life.
You make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.
Check Love Compatibility with Your Girlfriend on your Mobile Phone and show it to her if you're a perfect match!
If it were up to me to rearrange the alphabets, I would keep U & I together.
I tried but I can’t stop thinking about you!
My world has no meaning without you.
You are the reason for my smile.
Words aren’t enough to tell you how wonderful you are. I love you.
You make my heart melt!
Life has never been better, thanks to you, sweetheart!
I miss you, we should get together soon!
If I had to, I would wait for an eternity to be with you.
I will love you forever and always.
Waiting for you at home, come back soon. I miss you.
When I close my eyes, I see you. When I open my eyes, I see you. There is nothing I can do without thinking of you.
To have you as my girl is my honour. Be with me always!
They say love hurts, but I’m ready to take that risk, if I’m going to be with you.
I would climb a thousand mountains to see you smile.
I’d like to wake up next to you every morning!
You take my breath away.
My life is perfect, but it’s because I am with you.
I love yo_. All I need is ‘U’
If I was your bed, you’d sleep on top of me!
If I could hold you close again, I’d never let you go.
There are three steps to complete happiness: 1) You 2) Me 3) our hearts for eternity.
You are IN my mind every second of the day. But if you want, you can be IN my house right now.
If you see a shooting star, close your eyes and make a wish. It worked for me, I wished for you!
You’re my angel.
My love for you is never ending!
You are my star on a dark night, you are my hope when all is bleak, if it wasn’t for you, I’d never be me!
My life is a jigsaw puzzle and you’re my missing piece.
You bring sunshine into my life! You aren’t the sun, but you’re just as hot.
I can’t wait to be with you again. Loves and hugs.
They say love gives you wings but is that why I’m in seventh heaven?
You complete me.
I could attempt to live without you. But I would fail miserably.
Life is beautiful because of you.
For you I may be just one person, but for me you are the world.
I can’t live without you.
Thank you for supporting me today. If it wasn’t for you, I’d be lost.
When words aren’t enough to tell you how great you’ve been, remind me to come and kiss you.
Loving you is like breathing. I can’t stop and it’s necessary for my survival.
You + me = Happiness forever.
If loving you was against the law and kissing you was a crime, I’d happily spend my life in prison doing time.
I will love you for the rest of MY life.
It took me years to find perfection; I’m never going to let you go!
I’ll love you like no other. Be with me always!
People come and go, but you and I will stay together, forever.
On this special day of your life, I want to tell you how much I love you. Happy birthday, baby!
If I was a planet and you my moon, I’d stop spinning just by looking at you.
The world can cry foul by seeing you with me, but everything is fair in love and war.
You are the one for me.
A date is a formality I need to complete, before I can tell you how much I love you!
Our marriage officially binds us together. Love you.
You are my number 1!
Every time I see you, I love you more than before.
You take my breath away.
I hope you have a good night. Kisses and hugs!
When you are with me, the world feels right.
I want to cuddle up with you. Get home soon!
I can never be wrong, because loving you feels so right!
I miss you; I want to be near you again!
When I have you, I have everything I need.
Every minute I spend away from you is a minute I waste.
To stay away from you is something I can’t do. Come home soon.
I will miss you while you’re gone and will wait for you to get back.
Just wanted you to know that someone is thinking of you!
My world is a happier place because of you.
We are a perfect match. I love you.
For the last 24 hrs, 1440 minutes, 86400 seconds, I’ve missed you.
I’m the luckiest man in the world to have you as my girl!
You have my heart, keep it safe.
I’m never going to let you go.
I’ve been thinking about you.
Every minute spent with you is a minute well spent.
If I’m the reason for your smile, you’ll never get a reason to frown.
I love you, I miss you and I can’t wait to see you today!
Even with a text message, saying I love you is easy. So take
your pick from the above text messages and send some love right away!
Sexual questions for couples - Intimate and fun questions about sex to ask your partner
There are many questions related to your partner's sex life that you
could ask them. Answers to some of these questions can provide an
insight into your partner's personality. You can also know what you have
in common and where you differ in sex. These questions aren't meant to
be asked one after the other in a rapidfire manner. That would
intimidate anyone! Rather, try to get answers to these over a period of
time. Some of these questions are open ended and can shed light on your
partner's sexual habits and preferences, thereby improving your love
life in the long run.
1) Have you ever fantasised about a person of the same sex?
2) Have you ever had sex with someone of the same gender or indulged in kissing/fondling?
3) Do you find yourself attracted to people of the same sex sometimes?
TIP: Tell Me Honey...2000 Questions for Couples
, the best-selling book from Amazon.com has 2000 questions across 75
categories including questions about love, sex and romance that you can
ask your partner. Find out your partner's secret desires, fantasies,
hidden fears and inner feelings. Come closer as a couple like never
before! This book is also available as an instant download ebook.
4) Do you have any sexually transmitted diseases?
5) Have you ever had unprotected sex? When? With whom?
6) Do you have any fetishes - including foot fetishes, sadism and masochism etc?
7) How important is sex to you?
8) How important do you think fidelity is, in a relationship?
9) How would you react if you found out your partner were disloyal to you?
10) How old were you when you first kissed?
11) Are you a virgin? If not, how old were you when you lost your virginity?
12) Who did you lose your virginity to? What was the experience like?
13) Which are the three people of the opposite sex you consider the most attractive?
14) Have you ever been forced into having sex?
15) How many sexual partners have you had to date?
16) Have you ever used sex toys?
17) Do you masturbate? How often?
18) Have you ever forced yourself sexually on a person?
19) Have you ever had sex with a person significantly older or younger than yourself?
20) Describe a sexual fantasy you would like to fulfil someday.
21) Have you ever had a one-night-stand?
22) Have you ever had sex with someone related to you?
23) Have you ever picked up someone from a singles bar?
24) Have you ever had phone sex?
25) Do you browse porn on the internet or on television?
26) Which are the three people of the same sex you consider the most attractive?
27) Have you ever paid for sex?
28) Have you ever been paid for sex?
29) Have you ever provided sexual favors to get anything in return, money or some other benefit?
30) If your boss promised you the promotion you were very keen to get
but insisted that you spend a weekend with him, pleasing him sexually,
would you agree?
31) Is there anything you would want to change about the way you look
through plastic surgery if you had the choice and could afford it?
32) Would you pose nude for playboy if they offered you $1,000,000.
33) Have you ever been part of a sex orgy?
34) Have you ever tied Tantric Sex? Would you like to?
35) Have you ever cross-dressed?
36) Have you ever wondered what it would have been to be born as the opposite sex?
El juego de roles es una de las principales fantasías sexuales de las mujeres (41% lo haría). Es inútil pretender que un hombre que se respete a sí mismo pueda experimentar algo así sin sentirse como un completo tonto.
Requiere una gran dosis de incredulidad (pero también ver los
especiales sobre extraterrestres, y eso no hace la experiencia menos
divertida). Varios roles populares -jefe(a) y secretaria(o), profesor(a)
y estudiante, stripper y cliente(a)- se encasillan dentro del tema de
“alguien tiene el control y el otro está a su merced”.
“Hay una dinámica muy fuerte, aún en las
relaciones sanas y divertidas sexualmente” dice Jean Mone, terapista
sexual de Nueva York. “Los juegos de roles permiten al hombre y a la
mujer concretar sus fantasías de una manera que no los dejará sentirse vulnerables”.
Si quieres empezar a hacerlo con ella, la cosa no tiene que comenzar fuera del dormitorio. “Mi novio me compró lencería de encaje
que no es como alguna otra cosa que me haya puesto antes” dice Brittany
(27, profesora). “No es de ningún modo mi estilo, pero cuando me la
pongo, me siento una persona distinta en la cama: atractiva, loca, poderosa“.
Cuando quieran que la cosa se vuelva más pública,
vayan a un bar donde ninguno de ustedes sea reconocido. Lleguen con una
diferencia de 20 minutos y trata de levantarla, pretendiendo que nunca antes han puesto los ojos uno en el otro.
Si puedes actuar bajo un argumento, hazlo. De otra manera, crea un
nombre, una ocupación y un contexto, y hazlo divertido. ¿Siempre
quisiste acercarte a una extraña atractiva? ahora puedes. Siempre hay
algo excitante acerca de hacer pública la sexualidad.
Más adelante, hazle algunos arreglos al asunto del
bar. Usa ropa que ella no haya visto antes y una colonia diferente,
porque el sentido del olfato está muy ligado a la memoria, sobre todo en
las mujeres. Tú quieres que olvide quién eres. Si solías usar una
colonia Calvin Klein, usa ahora una Diesel.
Recuerda que debes apuntar hacia la euforia, no hacia la histeria.
Está bien reirse, pero también es una buena idea sentir que estás de
caza. Si la idea de ponerte un gorro pirata hace que te partas de risa, haz el asunto un poco más personal:
si trabajas en ventas, haz el rol de un vendedor que llega a la casa de
una chica que se encuentra sola. Tu premio no será un Oscar… sino sexo
del bueno.
Sexting (traducido en algunos lugares como “sexteo”) es un término
importando del inglés, mezcla de sex (sexo) y texting (enviar
mensajes de texto vía celular). Se refiere al envío de mensajes con contenidos
provocativos o eróticos. No se trata de enviar fotos o videos de ti mismo
desnudo (ese no es buen consejo ni para nosotros ni para ellas, sino recuerden
con lo que pasó con esa ministra en Puerto Rico); no es pornografía, sino más
bien provocación.
El sexting, bien manejado, puede
ayudar a llevar una vida sexual saludable. “Es una grandiosa manera de
ser abierto con respecto a lo que quieres y tus deseos, a la vez que
aprendes cuáles son los de tu pareja” dice Reid Mihalko, especialista en sexualidad y relaciones que ha dado talleres a más de 30,000 personas (desgraciadamente, la tecnología también puede ser una amenaza para tu sexualidad).
Mihalko da algunas indicaciones sobre lo que hay que hacer y lo que no en cada etapa de la relación con respecto al sexting:
Si no han tenido sexo
Qué hacer: Usa el sexting como oportunidad
para aprender acerca de lo que a ella le gusta y lo que no. “Cada
mensaje es una oportunidad para obtener más información” dice Mihalko.
“Puedes preguntarle lo que le gusta en el dormitorio y tomar nota
mentalmente para usarlo posteriormente”. Di algo como “a mí me gusta
esto, ¿y a ti?” para darle tips sobre ti también. Los mensajes de texto también sirven para conquistarla. Qué no hacer: Ponerte demasiado entusiasta. “Debes ser honesto y juguetón sin llegar a abrumarla” dice Mihalko. “El sexting es como el tenis, la bola debe estar de cada lado en partes iguales”.
Si han tenido sexo por primera vez
Qué hacer: Elogia su cuerpo y dile que disfrutaste
muchísimo la noche. “A todos nos encantan los cumplidos, pero las
mujeres son usualmente más conscientes de su cuerpo” dice Mihalko. Pero
háblale con nivel, algo como “tus piernas me volvieron loco esa noche”.
Nada de vulgaridades. Dale una leída a las siete frases que encienden a una mujer y a las 29 cosas más excitantes que le puedes decir a una mujer desnuda. Qué no hacer: No trates de planear con ella la
siguiente ocasión en que tendrán sexo. “Debes dejar claro que
disfrutaste del sexo que simplemente ocurrió” dice Mihalko. “El que no
te tomes el tiempo para apreciar el tiempo que pasaron juntos puede
hacer que ella se sienta usada”. Cómo usar los mensajes de texto para seducirla.
Si estás en una relación
Qué hacer: Comparte tus fantasías. “Usa el sexting
para tentar el terreno sin que se sienta presionada” dice Mihalko. Por
ejemplo, “¿qué piensas tú que es excitante pero nunca harías?”. Esto te
permite aprender más sobre sus intereses mientras compartes los tuyos, y
nunca sabes hacia dónde te puede llegar un diálogo abierto. Tal vez a
alguna de sus fantasías. Qué no hacer: No enseñes ninguno de sus mensajes a
tus amigos. Jamás. “Puede que a ti no te importe que sus amigas vean tus
mensajes” dice Mihalko, “pero el sexo es muy diferente para las
mujeres”. Muchas de ellas aún temen ser percibidas como promiscuas. “El
compartir un sext es simplemente irrespetuoso”.
Aunque suene extraño, ninguna mujer nace sabiendo cómo tener un orgasmo. Es hora de dejar los complejos de lado, y comenzar a aprender...
Cierto es que son muchas las mujeres que dicen jamás haber experimentado un orgasmo, aun cuando lo intentaron por todos los medios. Pero antes que nada, debería preguntarse que la hace tan segura de que nunca ha tenido un orgasmo.
Sucede que, según señalan muchos sexólogos, a sus consultorios concurren varias mujeres que se quejan, inicialmente, de que nunca han tenido un orgasmo, aunque luego comentan haber experimentado sensaciones similares a las de un orgasmo.
El problema, es que muchas de ellas no tienen una idea realista de lo que es un orgasmo, pues a diferencia de lo que señala el sentido popular, los orgasmos no siempre hacen ‘ver las estrellas’ y ‘llegar al cielo’.
Pero también es posible que usted sea una de las cientos de miles de mujeres alrededor del mundo que jamás han podido, efectivamente, experimentar la sensación de un orgasmo.
En estos casos, libros, recomendaciones médicas, sugerencias de amigos, hierbas, inciensos, y demás elementos, formaron seguramente parte de su búsqueda, aunque el resultado fue siempre estéril, y por demás frustrante.
En busca del orgasmo Llegar al orgasmo no es una ciencia ni un privilegio de pocas. Sobre todo, cuando se ponen en práctica ciertas acciones que podrían predisponer mejor a su cuerpo para el momento en que se esté llegando al climax sexual.
1. La masturbación
En primer lugar, sería bueno probar con la masturbación, pues muchas mujeres encuentran más fácil tener un orgasmo teniendo sexo con sí mismas, es decir mediante la masturbación, que manteniendo sexo con otra persona.
En este sentido, sería bueno probar con los vibradores, especialmente con aquellos más útiles para las mujeres a las que le cuesta mantener un orgasmo, como por ejemplo los que combinan el estímulo vaginal y clitorideo, y en donde cada forma de estimulación posee sistemas de control separados, para que pueda adaptarse más específicamente a las necesidades de cada cuerpo.
2. La comunicación
Por supuesto, la mayoría de las mujeres buscarán también alcanzar el orgasmo en una relación de pareja. Sin embargo, a menudo, las mujeres tienen dificultades para llegar al orgasmo con sus parejas por el hecho de que ellas no están seguras de cómo comunicarle lo que más le gusta, o bien lo que más le disgusta. Por eso, si apreciaría experimentar con algo nuevo, o bien dejar de hacer algo que le causa displacer, no debería dudar en comunicarlo.
En este sentido, si tiene problemas, debería preguntarse como es la comunicación con él. Por ejemplo, cuándo algo no le agrada… ¿cómo permite que su pareja sepa eso? O, por el contrario, ¿cómo permite que su pareja sepa cuando algo le sienta especialmente bien?
También es muy común que, a menudo, por el hecho de que la presión por tener un orgasmo sea tan grande, muchas mujeres (y hombres) se encuentren a sí mismas diciendo a sus parejas que de hecho han tenido orgasmos, cuando en realidad jamás los experimentaron realmente, solo por el hecho de hacer que la otra persona se sienta bien.
Lamentablemente, es cierto que muchas veces cuesta mucho decir estas verdades a las parejas, pues cuándo ellas se enteran prefieren cerrarse a la idea de que una no los quiere sexualmente, pues si ellos serían atractivos para su persona, se supone que usted habría tenido un orgasmo.
Sin embargo, siempre debería ser honesta con sí misma y repensar si alguna vez se animó a comentarles a sus amantes que en realidad nunca había tenido un orgasmo. Sucede que si usted no oculta su problema, es posible que ambos trabajen en conjunto en pos de solucionar el problema.
Pero además, muchos hombres tienen una extraordinaria habilidad para tomar acciones sexuales a sus parejas mediante cuestiones que ellas nunca podrían hacer por sí mismas, mediante la cual tal vez sea posible que lleguen al orgasmo. No sólo le pueden brindar sexo oral, sino también utilizar sus dedos para llegar al punto G y continuar incluso cuando usted ya podría haber parado.
3. La predisposición
También debería preguntarse cuán buena es usted siendo ‘egoísta’ y dedicándose solo a recibir placer ¿Siente como si siempre necesitaría dar antes que recibir? ¿Podría estar cómodamente una noche entera en la cual usted nunca, o casi nunca, toque ni estimule a su pareja, sino que este se ocupe totalmente del tema y la estimule a usted?
Sucede que, en muchas oportunidades, ocurre que las mujeres experimentan dificultades para tener un orgasmo sólo porque ellas se sienten incómodas en su posición de receptoras. Por eso, el aprendizaje sobre cómo relajarse y gozar del momento, dejándole el trabajo al ‘otro’, puede ser clave para sortear estas barreras.
4. La relajación
Además, sería bueno que se pregunte cómo sabe realmente cuando está relajada. Esto es importante por que tener un orgasmo es, en parte, una respuesta física a un estímulo, con lo que si una puede aprender a relajarse lo suficiente, el cuerpo tendrá, naturalmente, una mejor respuesta.
Para relajarse, algunas mujeres han encontrado que son necesarias dos diferentes formas de estímulo. Uno de estos tipos de estímulo, son aquellos que podrían hacerla sensibilizarse lo suficiente como para llegar al orgasmo, mientras que la otra forma de estímulo está diseñada para ‘distraer’ al cerebro permitiendo así que sea el cuerpo quien tome el control. Por ejemplo, algunas mujeres que están muy incómodas con el estímulo anal, han encontrado que ese mismo estímulo anal combinado con el sexo oral, les permitía de hecho llegar al orgasmo.
En suma… Más allá de todo, sería importante que no se desespere por tratar de alcanzar el orgasmo. Si lo piensa bien, se dará cuenta de que esto es muy importante, pero… ¿Cuáles serían las grandes diferencias que podría tener en su vida después de haber tenido un orgasmo? ¿Cómo mejorará su vida general? ¿Qué cosa se imagina que podrá cambiar tanto?
En muchas oportunidades, habrá que, simplemente, poner en práctica estas sugerencias, y luego esperar sin ansiedades y desesperaciones, pues el orgasmo podrá llegar justamente en el momento menos esperado.
Si
el hombre durante el acto sexual “debe” estar “mentalizándose” y
“concentrándose” en los diferentes “niveles” de control eréctil, ¿acaso
no se estaría “perdiendo” esa ocasión de placer subliminal de la
relación?
Autor: Alberto G. Alvite
Desde que empecé a
visitar Enplenitud, soy un ávido lector de cuanto tema se sugiera, por
supuesto he observado que el que más asiduidad parece visitarse es el de
la sexualidad.
Generalmente asentimos o no con opiniones
vertidas sobre el tema, claro que lo hacemos desde nuestra propia
óptica, se dice que cada cual “habla de la feria, de acuerdo a como le
ha ido en ella”.
En la opinión sugerida en el artículo: “El buen
sexo no es sólo producto del instinto” tal vez, - no tengo la autoridad
para disentir con el mismo- sea un “método” excepcional de la relación,
pues ya había leído en un libro del Dr. Deepak Chopra: “Cuerpos sin edad
mentes sin tiempo”, que se especifican casos muy puntuales de dominios
mentales sobre distintos órganos
Pero, siempre hay un pero, si
como se manifiesta en dicha opinión el hombre durante el acto sexual
“debe” estar “mentalizándose” y “concentrándose” en los diferentes
“niveles” de control eréctil, ¿acaso no se estaría “perdiendo” esa
ocasión de placer subliminal de la relación?
En otro artículo de
la misma serie: “Como restablecer el erotismo....” la opinión allí
vertida responde a una realidad mas pragmática y común cuando se
asevera: “No espere ver siempre cohetes y lucecitas de colores. Tómelo
como venga y disfrútelo lo más posible”.
Como mencioné
anteriormente, “Cada cual hable de la feria.....”,después de más de
cincuenta años de haber practicado – aún hoy lo sigo realizando - esa
hermosa relación, no por costumbre y tampoco “por instinto”, uno tiene
para sí diferentes opiniones, tal vez no mejores, si no “diferentes”.
Si
partimos de la premisa de que las relaciones de pareja deben ser –
salvando las distancias – como una avenida de doble mano, la relación
sexual no debe encasillarse en un compartimiento estanco.
De
ninguna manera, todo tendrá que ver con todo, llegar a la íntima
relación del sexo “COMPARTIDO”, no debe buscarse como un knock-out
rápido que busca el boxeador para vencer a su contrincante.
Al
contrario, las “fintas” de ambos - no contendientes ni rivales - en pos
de un mismo logro, tendrán la motivación mutua de “ambos y simultáneos
Knock-Outs”.
Es casi seguro que si llegamos a “dominar” esos
estados sugeridos como: llegar al nivel 9, bajar al 5, subir al 7, creo
que nos perderíamos el “Gran Número”.!!!!!???
Su cuerpo se distiende, sus ojos se
cierran, ella preside la timidez y hace esfuerzo para que los órganos
sexuales se unan lo más estrechamente posible.
Las cinco reacciones de la mujer ante las acciones del hombre son las siguientes, según Sou-nu:
*Si la mujer desea la unión sexual, se observará un cambio en la respiración. *Si desea ser penetrada, los orificios nasales se dilatarán y su boca quedará entreabierta. *Si desea que suba la marea del Yin, su cuerpo se estremecerá y se constreñirá notablemente. *Si desea ardientemente ser satisfecha, su transpiración será abundante. *Si su deseo ha sido calmado, su cuerpo se distenderá y sus ojos permanecerán cerrados como si estuviera dormida.
La lista de Wou-Hien sobre los síntomas reveladores del placer en la mujer son:
*Ella jadeará y no podrá controlar el tono de su voz. *Sus ojos están cerrados y los orificios nasales dilatados y difícilmente puede hablar. *Su mirada sigue fijamente a la del hombre. *Sus orejas se enrojecen y su rostro también, pero la punta de su lengua estará ligeramente fina. *Sus manos estarán ardiendo, su vientre caliente y al mismo tiempo le murmurará palabras casi ininteligibles. *Su semblante parecerá estar hechizado, su cuerpo se quedará como muerto y sus miembros flácidos. *Debajo de su lengua, la saliva fluye abundantemente y su cuerpo está pegado al del hombre. *Las palpitaciones de su vulva se perciben fácilmente y está muy mojada.
Los diez signos en la mujer que indican al hombre los pasos a seguir:
*Ella abraza al hombre con los dos brazos y le muestra que desea un contacto corporal más intenso. *Levanta sus piernas mostrándole que desea ser acariciada en la zona del clítoris. *Tensa su vientre. Indicando que desea ser penetrada superficialmente. *Sus piernas se ponen en funcionamiento. Es una forma de expresar un gran placer (contrae sus muslos). *Con sus pies acaricia y abraza a los del hombre. Significa que desea penetraciones más profundas. *Cruza sus piernas alrededor del hombre. Es señal de que el placer va en aumento. *Se empieza a mover de un lado al otro. Las penetraciones deben ser más profundas y fuertes. *Su cuerpo se incorpora y se funde con el del hombre. *Es un momento de placer extremo. *Su cuerpo se distiende. Demuestra que su cuerpo y sus miembros se van relajando. *Su vulva se humedece abundantemente. El hombre sabrá que su pareja está satisfecha.
El sexo es un tema en el que abundan las preguntas, por
eso no sobran algunas respuestas básicas sobre una materia natural, pero
super importante, que requiere de corazón y cabeza.
Preguntas
1. ¿Es verdad que la primera menstruación indica que una niña se convierte en mujer?
-
La primera menstruación indica que el cuerpo está preparado para un
embarazo. Pero en muchos casos el cuerpo va por un lado y la mente por
otro, así que no necesariamente se es mujer a partir de la primera
menstruación. De hecho el ser hombre o mujer es algo que está
determinado desde el nacimiento, pero para ser una mujer adulta se debe
tener madurez, responsabilidad y mucho criterio para saber qué está bien
y qué no, y eso no tiene nada que ver con la menstruación. Y menos con
la preparación para ser mamá.
2. ¿Hacer el amor y tener relaciones sexuales es lo mismo?
-
Físicamente implican casi lo mismo: caricias, besos y penetración, pero
emocionalmente no tienen nada que ver. Hacer el amor, como su nombre lo
indica, habla de una pareja que expresa el gran amor que siente a
través de su cuerpo, se comprende, se respeta y asume las consecuencias.
Por eso lo ideal es que dos personas hagan el amor, y no que tengan
simplemente relaciones sexuales.
3. ¿Es verdad que las relaciones sexuales se deben tener sólo cuando existe amor de por medio?
-
Aunque hay quienes las tienen sin amor de por medio, es mucho mejor
tenerlas cuando se ama profundamente, pues son más satisfactorias,
emocional y físicamente. Cuando se tienen relaciones sexuales sin amor,
puede haber sentimiento de vacío y complejo de culpa.
4. ¿Cuál es la edad ideal para tener relaciones sexuales?
-
No existe una edad ideal, sino un momento específico: cuando una
persona siente que está realmente preparada, no sólo física, sino
también emocionalmente. Para darse cuenta de eso, hay que hacerse estas
preguntas:
¿Por qué me gustaría tener relaciones
sexuales?Por curiosidad, para satisfacer una necesidad física mía o de
mi novio o porque está de moda? ¿Amo de verdad a mí pareja? ¿Sé cuál es el método de planificación familiar que debo usar, que vaya de acuerdo con mi edad? ¿Podemos asumir las consecuencias si ese método falla y quedo embarazada? ¿Puedo pedirle a mi novio que use preservativo? ¿Soy
capaz de pedirle a mi novio un examen médico que me certifique que no
está contagiado de ninguna enfermedad de transmisión sexual? 6. ¿Qué riesgos tienen las relaciones sexuales?
-
Embarazos no deseados y contagios de enfermedades de transmisión sexual
como sida, hepatitis B, gonorrea, sífilis. También pueden surgir muchas
dudas emocionales como: ¿Será que me quiere? ¿Seguirá conmigo? ¿Nos
iremos a casar? ¿Me estará usando...? El complejo de culpa es una de las
consecuencias más comunes, y generalmente indica que algo no estuvo
bien o que aún no era el momento.
7. ¿A quién le puedo pedir orientación si no puedo hablar sobre sexo con mis padres?
-
Para algunos papás es muy difícil hablar de sexo; primero, porque se
dan cuenta de que ¿su niña¿ se les creció y segundo, porque muchos de
ellos no tuvieron una buena educación sexual y ni siquiera saben abordar
el tema. Lo ideal sería que ellos mismos dieran la orientación, pero
también lo pueden hacer los sicólogos del colegio, o los de los Centros
de jóvenes de Profamilia.
8. ¿La masturbación es buena o mala?
-
Científicamente no se ha comprobado que la masturbación cause algún
daño. La puedes considerar como un proceso que hace parte del
desarrollo, aprendizaje y exploración sexual.
9. ¿Qué es un orgasmo?
-
Un orgasmo es el punto máximo de la relación sexual. Es una sensación
agradable y placentera que recorre el cuerpo, pero que se concentra en
el área genital. Cuando ocurre, dura muy pocos segundos y
simultáneamente se acelera el ritmo cardíaco y la respiración. También
se presenta con la masturbación u otro tipo de estimulación.
10. ¿Si siento alguna atracción por una persona de mi mismo sexo, significa que soy homosexual?
-
Sentirse atraído por una persona del mismo sexo durante la adolescencia
es normal, pues ese tipo de sensaciones hacen parte del desarrollo
sexual y los procesos de identificación; además ayudan a reafirmar la
personalidad. Si la atracción es permanente y no pasajera, se debe pedir
orientación profesional.
11. ¿Puede haber embarazo sin penetración?
-
Sí. Cuando hay contacto de los fluidos corporales del área genital de
los dos miembros de la pareja, es posible que haya fecundación.
12. ¿Cómo se aprende a besar?
- Lo más indicado es ser espontáneo y adaptarse a la otra persona.
